The Record Collectors Guild Forum Index

Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic Printable version Log in to check your private messages View next topic
Author Message
cityboy
Post subject: Bad joke thread gone???  PostPosted: Sep 03, 2007 - 12:28 PM
R.C.Guild-SMR
R.C.Guild-SMR


Joined: Mar 22, 2003
Posts: 5528
Location: Ontario Canada
I think we lost the bad joke thread in the last virus?? Sad

All my fine work gone!! Crying or Very sad


I must begin again!!!

very happy


> An older couple at an art exhibition were staring at a painting that
> had them completely confused. The painting depicted three well hung
> black men totally naked sitting on a park bench. Two of the figures
> had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink penis.
>
> They asked the curator of the gallery for an interpretation.
He
> explained how it represented the sexual emasculation of African
> Canadians in a predominantly white, patriarchal society. In fact, he
> pointed out, some serious critics believe that the pink penis also
> reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by gay
> men in contemporary society.
>
> After the curator left, a man with a noticeable accent and a large
> Tim Horton's Coffee approached the couple and said "Would you like to
> know what the painting is really all about?"
>
> The couple looked at the man with some degree of suspicion..."How and
> why," asked the couple, "could you claim to be more of an expert than
> the curator of this gallery?"
>
> Because I'm the guy who painted it", he replied. "In fact, there's no
> African Canadians shown here at all.
>
> They're just three Newfoundland coal miners. The guy in the middle
> went home for lunch".

_________________
<B>cityboy's Ebay Auctions!</B>

I'm not bad, i'm just drawn that way.
 
 View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website  
Reply with quote Back to top
RidinTheWind
Post subject: RE: Bad joke thread gone???  PostPosted: Sep 04, 2007 - 11:43 AM
R.C.Guild-SM
R.C.Guild-SM


Joined: Dec 13, 2005
Posts: 4740

Laughing

_________________
Anyone who thinks he has a foolproof plan hasn't counted on the ingenuity of fools.
 
 View user's profile Send private message  
Reply with quote Back to top
Former Member
Post subject: RE: Bad joke thread gone???  PostPosted: Sep 04, 2007 - 01:25 PM






here is a joke...

Herb Alpert A&M SP-101 The Lonely Bull NM 25$
Goldmine 5th Edition American Records 1950 - 1975

:p
 
   
Reply with quote Back to top
RidinTheWind
Post subject: RE: Bad joke thread gone???  PostPosted: Sep 10, 2007 - 12:35 PM
R.C.Guild-SM
R.C.Guild-SM


Joined: Dec 13, 2005
Posts: 4740

To keep this thread going, I will now offer the only poetry I know. Wink

There once was a girl from Knizes
Who had breasts of two different sizes
One was so small
It was hardly at all
But the other was big and won prizes

_________________
Anyone who thinks he has a foolproof plan hasn't counted on the ingenuity of fools.
 
 View user's profile Send private message  
Reply with quote Back to top
jmakOffline
Post subject: RE: Bad joke thread gone???  PostPosted: Sep 13, 2007 - 07:16 PM
R.C.Guild-SM
R.C.Guild-SM


Joined: Sep 05, 2007
Posts: 736
Location: Columbus OH
Status: Offline
A man walked into his living room with a sheep under his arm. His wife just looked at him. The man said, "You see this pig? This is the pig I'm cheating on you with." His wife said, "That's not a pig." The man replied, "I wasn't talking to you."

_________________
You can learn a lot from Lydia.
 
 View user's profile Send private message  
Reply with quote Back to top
cityboy
Post subject:   PostPosted: Sep 14, 2007 - 01:14 PM
R.C.Guild-SMR
R.C.Guild-SMR


Joined: Mar 22, 2003
Posts: 5528
Location: Ontario Canada
A husband and wife went to counseling after 18 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 18 years they had been married. She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of un-met needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking the wife to stand, he embraced and kissed her passionately.

The woman then quietly sat down as though in a daze. The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do that?"

The husband thought for a moment and replied, "Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I'm golfing."

_________________
<B>cityboy's Ebay Auctions!</B>

I'm not bad, i'm just drawn that way.
 
 View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website  
Reply with quote Back to top
kat1370Offline
Post subject:   PostPosted: Oct 14, 2007 - 04:06 PM
R.C.Guild-M-SMR
R.C.Guild-M-SMR


Joined: Jul 08, 2005
Posts: 5855
Location: Ohio
Status: Offline
A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant operated by a fellow cannibal.

Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu...
Broiled Missionary: $10.00
Fried Explorer: $15.00
Grilled Republican: $100.00
Baked Democrat: $100.00

The cannibal called the waiter over and asked, 'Why such a price
difference for the Politicians?'

The cook replied, "Have you ever tried to clean one? They're so full of crap, it takes all morning."
 
 View user's profile Send private message  
Reply with quote Back to top
whirlingdiscOffline
Post subject:   PostPosted: Oct 16, 2007 - 06:38 AM
R.C.Guild-M-SMR
R.C.Guild-M-SMR


Joined: Aug 29, 2002
Posts: 5829

Status: Offline
The teacher, Mrs. Smith, said to Johnny:
"Johnny, I have a question for you."
"Yes, Mrs Smith," Johnny replied.
Mrs. Smith laid out the following scenario:
"There are 3 crows sitting on a fence and a farmer shoots one. How many are left?"
Johnny immediately repled, "None."
Mrs. Smith said, "Umm...no...I think the answer is two."
Johnny retorted, "No, because the sound of the gunfire would scare off the other two."
The teacher responded, "Well, I think the answer is wrong, but I like the way you're thinking."
Next day, Johnny walked up to Mrs Smith and told her he had a question for her.
"OK Johnny," said Mrs. Smith.
So Johnny laid out the following scenario:
"There are 3 married women, and each one has an ice cream. The first woman is licking the ice cream, the second is biting the ice cream, and the third is sucking the ice cream. Which one is married?"
Mrs. Smith hesitated and replied, "Well, uh, it's probably the one sucking the ice cream."
Johnny smiled and said, "No! It's the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking." Wink

_________________
Do what you dig---dig what you do!!!
 
 View user's profile Send private message  
Reply with quote Back to top
kat1370Offline
Post subject:   PostPosted: Oct 16, 2007 - 06:58 AM
R.C.Guild-M-SMR
R.C.Guild-M-SMR


Joined: Jul 08, 2005
Posts: 5855
Location: Ohio
Status: Offline
Whoa!!!! Shocked Shocked Shocked Laughing Laughing Laughing
 
 View user's profile Send private message  
Reply with quote Back to top
cityboy
Post subject:   PostPosted: Oct 19, 2007 - 01:43 AM
R.C.Guild-SMR
R.C.Guild-SMR


Joined: Mar 22, 2003
Posts: 5528
Location: Ontario Canada
Three Hillbillies?are sitting on a porch shootin' the breeze.

1st Hillbilly says: "My wife sure is stupid!...She bought an air conditioner. ."

2nd Hillbilly?says: "Why is that stupid?"

1st Hillbilly says: "We ain't got no 'lectricity!"

2nd Hillbilly?says: "That's nothin'! My wife is so stupid, she bought one of them new fangled warshin' machines!"

1st H illbilly says: "Why is that so stupid?"

2nd Hillbilly says: "'Cause we ain't got no plummin'!"

3rd Hillbilly says: "That ain't nuthin'! My wife is dumber than both yer wifes put together! I was going through her purse the other day lookin' fer some change, and I found 6 condoms in thar."

1st and 2nd Hillbillies say: "Well, what's so dumb about that?"

3rd Hillbilly says: "She ain't got no pecker."

_________________
<B>cityboy's Ebay Auctions!</B>

I'm not bad, i'm just drawn that way.
 
 View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website  
Reply with quote Back to top
Display posts from previous:     
Jump to:  
All times are GMT
Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic Printable version Log in to check your private messages View next topic
Powered by PNphpBB2 © 2003-2007 The PNphpBB Group
Credits